Friday, June 02, 2006

What our military people can't do - part II

More of my favorites from the list.

103. Vodka, green food coloring, and a 'Cool Mint' Listerine® bottle is not a good combination.
116. Burn pits for classified material are not revel fires - therefore it is wrong to dance naked around them.
133. An order to put polish on my boots means the whole boot.
139. Not allowed to use a broadsword to disprove 'The Pen is Mightier than the sword'.
140. 'Calvin-Ball' is not authorized PT.
143. I should not drink three quarts of blue food coloring before a urine test.
144. Nor should I drink three quarts of red food coloring, and scream during the same.
161. There is no such thing as a were-virgin.
169. 'A full magazine and some privacy' is not the way to help a potential suicide.
197. Must not valiantly push officers onto hand grenades to save the squad.
198. Despite the confusing similarity in the names, the "Safety Dance" and the "Safety Briefing" are never to be combined.

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