Saturday, May 20, 2006

More RPS

These guys at USARPS might not take themselves as seriously as I thought.
This is what their science says:

* If a woman throws three straight rocks with any kind of regularity — she’s a gold-digger.
* If a man throws four straight papers — he is whipped by his high school sweetheart and just doesn’t know how to get out of the relationship.
* If a man throws two papers followed by a rock — he has never kissed a girl, but has touched a breast on a dare.
* If a woman throws mostly paper — she’s recently written in her journal about how she told her boyfriend she misses him and he answered “But I just saw you an hour ago” instead of “I miss you too” and how hurt she was by it, and how she will exact her revenge on the uncaring bastard.
* If a man mostly throws scissors, he also Googles his name every day hoping he finally commands a presence on the web, but always logs off weeping in shame.
* If a woman rarely throws rock, she takes more than two hours putting her make-up on in the morning, and still wears too much eye-liner.
* If a man rarely throws scissors, he’s followed Phish on tour for at least 3 months straight at some point of his life.
* If a man throws more than four scissors in a row, he is addicted to playing Tetris on his cell phone in hopes of beating his own high score again and again.
* If a woman rarely throws paper, she has at least experimented with another girl, and most likely has made out with her closest girlfriend, though she doesn’t consider herself bi.
* If a man alternates throwing rock and scissors, he’s hoping to find romance on an internet dating site, but the picture of him flexing his triceps in a wife-beater stance next to his ‘92 Mustang just isn’t doing the trick.

I still don't get the idea of a $50,000 prize for this game yet. Maybe it's really good PR.

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